The amazigness of our living room window is not easily conveyed. We see everyone...every-one. I see you, and you can't see me. We know that there's a guy living in front of us who runs barefoot in the mornings, and we know what time the waiters at Mitchell start work in the mornings. Creepy, I agree, and yet, so much fun.
Metaphorically speaking, this is a window facing into a whole new world of code names. Beginning with our neighbours across the street. Notably, "Hair Guy". This man sits in front of his computer in the evenings, presumably to work, and proceeds to groom his hair for hours. With his hands, a comb, a pen...his girlfriend does it for him some times too. He just sits there and pulls at his hair, untangling it, parting it to one side, then the other, then combing it back, then caressing it...we are fully convinced he suffers from some kind of fetish. Also, how soft must his hair be? "And how greasy?", some of our visitors have asked. How has his hair not fallen off after this amount of pulling?
Now, of major interest this year are the Scandinavians of St Andrews. Funnily enough, I hear they have been baptised the "Slytherins of St Andrews"...I don't know how I feel about that code name. But, nevertheless, we get creative with their identities too. Like last year, we had named one of them "Babyface". This summer something happened; maybe his mum gave him an extra Gerber or two, but Babyface has now been promoted to "Manface". In any case, several of the Scandinavian men here seem to have gotten older over the break. Some not for the best (I hate to say, Mr "This-is-what-perfection-looks-like").
Then I discovered "Lady Moves", and boy oh boy do I wish I could move my hips that way. And have such little facial hair as he does. There's always something wrong when a guy looks like he uses more skin products than a girl. Maybe it's just better genes, who knows. For sure though, I will be asking him for some dance lessons before the semester ends (maybe some beauty tips as well).
This year we are (not really) missing our old neighbour, "Naked Girl"; she had a tendency to get changed without closing her bedroom curtains (or the windows). Winter was a bitch back in old Lade Braes, but she had the skin of an elephant and was not affected by the Siberian winds, I guess. "Naked Girl 2" has also been spotted this year, fully clothed for the time being , but I'm sure once the fashion shows start hitting town I'll be seeing more of her ass on posters.
"Mould Girl the Second" has made an appearance in my Swedish counterpart's life, as a cruel reminder of the life we could have had if we had moved into that house we viewed last year. The library, as usual, has provided some fantastic new additions to our repertoire, mainly "Our Little Non-friend" who, believe it or not, ALWAYS manages to get there before us. And despite the fact it is only the three of us in that area of the library at 8.15 a.m., he still won't even smile 'good morning' to us.
"Mexican Guy", who turned out not to be Mexican, was sighted a few times, although we dislike him for his lack of sass. Added to our favourites list is "Angel (ravish me) Face", who unfortunately does not reside in the same country as us, but is still very worthy of his nickname.
Best of all this year is finding out one's own code name: I apparently live with "Boots Girl" (and by looking at the shoes in my hallway, I think she kind of deserves that title). We've also had a few reappearances, such as the "Hot/Annoying Nerd"; wasn't he supposed to graduate? "Old Spice Guy" and "Smelly Balls Guy" are, sadly, classics we just can't shake off. Needless to say, however, this year we are seriously making the most of this: wherever we end up next will probably not have this amount of note-worthy people, and we will hopefully not be running into them day in, day out. The silver lining of graduating, huh?
No comments:
Post a Comment