Civilised Dating

We were watching Pride and Prejudice (as one does in this house when it's cold and Megavideo has been seized by the US government) and it suddenly occurred to me that, although Jane Austen was alive over two centuries ago, women haven't really changed much in the way they perceive men. Now, being fully aware that I am 100% guilty of being a proper Mrs. Bennett sometimes, I don't think this is particularly correct, seen as men have indeed changed quite a bit since then, and we've replaced the dropping of a handkerchief with a quicky at The Lizard. Why is this? Why do we still like to talk and talk about that particular text, which may or may not have had some mysterious hidden meaning, when, as one of my good friends says, "guys are guys and they mean what they're saying--there's no hidden meaning"? My ultra-feminist alter ego is not happy as I write these words, but I think I cannot hide the evidence: most girls spend a lot of time worrying about finding that special someone. In St Andrews, so many conversations revolve around this, and the Overheard group can only testify to this fact. And, also, to the fact that men do not go about relationships the same way that a Mr. Darcy would. Almost in its entirety, this is a good thing; I know we don't like to think so, but for all his charms and good looks, I doubt Mr. Darcy was particularly pro- women's emancipation. I do wish, however, that relationships nowadays had that element of slowness to them (as for the romanticism, it is hard to find the 'logom' amount of it nowadays). But, just when I thought that nothing could save love's face in St Andrews, the unbelievable happened.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, civilised dating happens even in St Andrews. I now know people who have just started going out, and are the most polite and gracious when negotiating their encounters; they send courteous Facebook messages to each other, with actual care to grammar and spelling, they meet in broad daylight in spacious coffee houses, they go out for a drink--and they actually only have one drink. I must say, it is refreshing to see that there is more to finding someone in St Andrews other than the usual drunk messages at three in the morning, the contents of which would in other circumstances be seen for what they are (animalistic, offensive appeals to meaningless sex), but somehow are very persuasive to many St Andreans.

So, although I have seen this to be the most common form of pairing up here, I have now refreshed hopes of seeing more and more civilised dating around town. Besides my aforementioned diplomatic daters, I see those couples that truly fit well together (particularly around the science departments, I wonder what they have figured out that others haven't...), the high-school sweethearts and other truly decent people, who wait ages and suffer all sorts of pining and longing before doing something about approaching that special someone.

But can dating get too civilised? I have to wonder, after all; I do attend the University that sparked the flame between the future queen and king of England. And with many of my peers sealing the deal after meeting here, perhaps I have been unjustly defaming dating in St Andrews all this time. To be honest, I think it's quite sweet that many people find their other half in this very romantic town (it is romantic, there is no denying it). I think the epitome of civilised dating always has the pier as its setting. Don't take it too far though; armoured knights proposing to their damsels on the St Andrews pier is just a bit too civilised for this century.